Dealing with bereavement by suicide

Please note: This article includes information regarding suicide, suicide prevention, and bereavement by suicide. If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or need immediate crisis support, please contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 (Australia) or 0800 543 354 (New Zealand), reach out to emergency services (000 in AU / 111 in NZ), or connect with support through Wisdom Wellbeing.

Grief and feelings of loss are some of the most complex emotions of the human experience. These feelings can become even more intricate and all-consuming when the cause of bereavement is suicide. It can be a profound shock to your system, especially if you tried your utmost to support the individual. Whatever the circumstances of the loss, all reactions to suicide are valid.

It can be incredibly difficult to deal with loss, and working through it takes time. There is no single "right" way to navigate bereavement by suicide, but there are proven approaches to ease the process and help you begin to process the grief.

It is worth remembering that strategies for coping with grief are not intended to erase the feelings you are experiencing. Rather, they are designed to help you come to terms with what you are feeling so you can process these emotions safely, rather than feeling overwhelmed or suppressing them which can be damaging to your ongoing mental health.

Feelings of grief are a natural response to loss; they should not be rejected or bottled up. Acknowledging and working through them is how we learn to cope and eventually heal.

What You Might Feel When Someone Dies by Suicide

Much like with any bereavement, you may experience a broad and intense spectrum of emotions. When managing bereavement by suicide, these feelings can be complex, deeply confusing, and frustrating.

Common emotions you may experience include:

• Grief and deep sadness

• Guilt and regret

• Shock and trauma

• Anger and frustration

• Shame or confusion

• Stress and anxiety

• Fatigue and physical exhaustion

• Isolation and loneliness

This range of emotions can be distressing and challenging to navigate. Persistent thoughts such as "Why?", "How?", "What could I have done?", "Did I do enough?", or "Is this my fault?" can feel overwhelming. This mixture of powerful feelings stemming from a traumatic loss can sometimes lead a person to blame themselves, others, or even the person who died.

If you were particularly close to the person, you may feel abandoned and alone in your grief. These feelings can be devastating. However, it is essential to remember that you are not alone. Even when it feels like no one understands, there are dedicated professionals, support groups, and peers who understand this specific type of pain and can support you through it.

In some instances, the trauma of losing a loved one to suicide can lead to depression, and you may even begin experiencing suicidal thoughts yourself as you struggle to cope. If you begin to experience thoughts of suicide, please seek immediate professional support.

You can reach out to crisis services such as Lifeline or speak with a professional counsellor who can offer a safe, confidential outlet to process your emotions before reaching a critical point. Support is available 24/7, 365 days a year through Wisdom Wellbeing’s Employee Assistance Program (EAP).

Emergency Notice: If you are in immediate danger or facing a crisis, please contact emergency services directly on 000 (Australia) or 111 (New Zealand), or call Lifeline on 13 11 14 (AU) / 0800 543 354 (NZ).

Support Available for Suicide Bereavement

When dealing with bereavement by suicide, having a reliable and trustworthy support network is vital. Because the intense emotions raised can place the bereaved person at risk, accessing appropriate support is essential.

If you are currently experiencing bereavement due to suicide, consider turning to the following resources:

Specialist Organisations & Support Services

Dedicated support services understand the specific nuances of suicide loss and offer confidential help line support, forums, and local or virtual support groups. Key organisations in the region include:

• Lifeline: 13 11 14 (AU) | 0800 543 354 (NZ)

• StandBy – Support After Suicide (Australia)

• Suicide Call Back Service (Australia – 1300 659 467)

• Mental Health Foundation of New Zealand / Skylight Trust (New Zealand)

• Grief Centre (New Zealand)

Friends and Family

Those closest to you often understand you best and can recognise when you are struggling. In many cases, they may be processing the same loss. Openly discussing your feelings with a trusted friend, family member, or partner can help alleviate the weight of stress and misplaced guilt.

Professional Counselling

While a personal network is valuable, you may feel uncomfortable discussing the full extent of your feelings with loved ones. Accessing professional counselling allows you to explore complex grief in a safe, structured, and confidential environment.

Counselling can be accessed through your GP, local community health services, private practitioners, or via your workplace Employee Assistance Programme (EAP). In structured sessions, a qualified therapist can help you develop personalised coping strategies to manage heavy emotions and navigate the grieving process at your own pace.

How an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) Can Help

Navigating grief after a suicide loss requires steady, expert care. Through Wisdom Wellbeing’s Employee Assistance Programme (EAP), employees and eligible family members can access confidential counselling services 24/7, 365 days a year.

Our qualified clinical team is experienced in providing goal-oriented counselling, critical incident support, and trauma-informed. We are committed to providing a compassionate, structured space to help you process loss and rebuild your emotional wellbeing.

In Summary

Grieving someone lost to suicide is a process that requires time, patience, and self compassion. Working through conflicting emotions, shock, and sadness is heavy work, and no one should have to carry it alone. Having the right support structures in place helps ensure you can grieve in a healthy, safe manner.

If at any point you feel overwhelmed or unable to cope, please reach out to an expert counsellor or crisis line immediately.

For more workplace health and wellbeing resources, visit Wisdom Wellbeing Australia.

FAQs

What is bereavement by suicide?

Bereavement by suicide refers to the grief experienced after losing someone to suicide. It often involves complex emotions such as shock, guilt, confusion, anger, and deep sadness, and may feel different from other forms of loss due to the traumatic nature of the event.

Is it normal to feel guilt or anger after a suicide loss?

Yes. Many people experience guilt, anger, or “what if?” thoughts following a suicide. These reactions are common and valid. Understanding that these emotions are part of the grieving process can help you begin to work through them safely.

When should I seek professional support?

If your emotions feel overwhelming, persistent, or begin affecting your daily functioning, professional support can help. Immediate help is essential if you experience suicidal thoughts or feel unable to cope. Confidential counselling is available through Wisdom Wellbeing’s EAP.

What support services are available in Australia and New Zealand?

Specialist organisations such as Lifeline, StandBy, Suicide Call Back Service, the Mental Health Foundation of New Zealand, Skylight Trust, and the Grief Centre offer confidential helplines, peer support, and resources for people affected by suicide loss.

How can an Employee Assistance Program help with suicide bereavement?

An EAP provides confidential counselling, trauma‑informed support, and structured guidance to help employees process grief. Wisdom Wellbeing’s EAP is available 24/7, offering a safe space to explore emotions and develop coping strategies.

Related Entities

Suicide bereavement support

Specialist organisations, helplines, and peer groups offering confidential assistance for people affected by suicide loss.

Grief and trauma responses

Emotional, cognitive, and physical reactions commonly experienced after traumatic bereavement, including shock, guilt, anger, and confusion.

Crisis intervention services

Immediate support options such as national helplines, emergency services, and crisis counselling pathways in Australia and New Zealand.

Employee Assistance Program (EAP)

Workplace‑provided counselling and wellbeing services offering confidential, trauma‑informed support for employees and eligible family members.

Mental health professionals

Psychologists, counsellors, and therapists who provide structured, evidence‑based approaches to help individuals process complex grief.

Postvention services

Support frameworks designed specifically for individuals and communities after a suicide, focusing on safety, stabilisation, and long‑term recovery.

Workplace wellbeing resources

Employer‑focused guidance, tools, and educational content that promote psychological safety and support employees experiencing grief or trauma.